Faith | E. Tyler Rowan

A Glimpse of God’s Power

Yesterday, one of my children was arguing with me about wearing shorts to school. This morning, I awoke to six inches of fresh snow on the ground.

The weather can turn on a dime, especially here in Alberta. And it has been one of the most odd winters I’ve ever experienced.

There are some things that simply speak to me of God’s power. Mountains, for example. It’s impossible for me to see a mountain and not think of God and His wonders. Tornadoes – same thing. But I’ve never really ‘seen’ God in the random weather patterns I’ve grown so used to. Until this morning.

It wasn’t the snow. Nor the rapid drop in temperature. But as I sat in my little red chair during sunrise, I was completely awestruck by a flash of lightning and a booming clap of thunder.

God. The One who created the earth and everything on it. The One who commands the wind and snow. Who can turn the weather on a dime. He can even bring a thunderstorm in the midst of a snowstorm.

God. The God who is in control of my life, my breath, and my being. His power knows no bounds.

Wow.

What things make you see and experience God?

Filed Under: faith, morning time, writing April 5, 2012 By Tyler Rowan 3 Comments

Did I mention it’s spring break?

In keeping with the whole “break” concept, I’ve given myself a pass on responsibilities and routine this week. Instead, we’re having some fun, tackling some long-overdue appointments, and maxin’ and relaxin’ at home.

But I don’t want to leave you hanging all week, so pop back each day and read a post from this series…

Just a Mom (part one) – It’s Okay to Want More

Just a Mom (part two) - 5 Key Principles to Getting Started

Just a Mom (part three) – Practical Tips for Getting out of the Slump

Just a Mom (part four) – It’s not About You

Just a Mom (part five) – Finding Your Calling

Just a Mom (part six) - Q & A #1, Q & A #2, Q & A #3

Filed Under: faith, family, ministry, motherhood, parenting, real life March 27, 2012 By Tyler Rowan Leave a Comment

There is more than one Path

Have you ever gotten completely hung up, trying to figure out what God’s will is for your life? Which path you should take?

I know I have… It’s especially easy to get snagged when there’s a decision to be made, and neither option is clearly wrong or bad.

Should I continue working as a stay-at-home mom or should I step out into the workforce? Which school should my kids attend? Should we stay where we are with a good job, good friends, good church or move to a new place where things will be different but still good? Do we have another baby or not?

I have good news for us all – it doesn’t matter!

Now hold on…before you get upset with me, please don’t misunderstand. I’m not saying it’s not important. I am not saying that God doesn’t care. It is important. If it’s important to you it’s important to God (and vice versa). And God cares about every detail of your life. His caring is deep and intimate.

But sometimes – dare I say oftentimes – we become tied up in knots worrying about whether we’re heading the right direction and walking in God’s will. The thing about God’s plan for our lives is that it’s not a static thing. His plan shifts and changes. I said that wrong – His plan doesn’t shift and change, He has always known the plan and will stick to it – but He reveals His plan to us one tiny step at a time, and it is not a continuous path in the same straight line.

Proverbs 3:5-7 says Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge Him and He will make your paths straight.

The word is PATHS, not path. This means that there will be more than one path; there will be different paths; the path will change. I didn’t say the path might change – the path will change.

Think of the path of your life, walking in God’s will and plans and purposes, as a road map. Very rarely can you get from point A to point B by sticking to one road. You’ll need to head East for a time, then turn your car onto a different highway heading South. Eventually, you’ll probably need to turn again, onto another road.

But here is the coolest thing about a road map… Have you ever noticed that there are often several possible routes that will get you to your destination? You could head halfway across the world on the wrong road, yet there is still a way to turn yourself around and get back to where you’re supposed to be headed.

It doesn’t really matter which route you decide to take. One path will have more bumps, more construction, more twists and turns. Another path will be more direct and straightforward. On one path you may have an easy journey; on the other you may learn invaluable lessons that equip you for your destination.

Too often, we allow ourselves to be filled with worry. We fret and we stress, overthinking each decision. We make ourselves sick with anxiety, and we remain unmoving, completely frozen by the fear of taking the wrong path and stepping out of God’s will. We stay parked on the shoulder, analyzing the map until we have a headache, going nowhere. Which, quite frankly, is exactly where the enemy would like us to hang out in this journey of faith.

Sometimes, sweet friends, we just need to go. We need to make a decision, pull out onto the road, and drive forward. We need to release the fear and worry of heading the wrong direction, and move ahead in faith and trust. Faith that God can get us where He needs us even if we make the occasional wrong turn. Trust that God is with us no matter which path we’re driving on.

In Joshua 1:9 God says to His people (that’s us) Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be terrified; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.

So if you feel stuck between two choices that could both be good, don’t allow the enemy to hold you frozen in terror. Instead, be strong, be courageous, and decide which way you will turn. Trust God to be with you wherever you go. Have faith that He will make your paths head straight to the destination that He has pre-determined for you. But keep moving. No one ever got to their destination by thinking about it and planning it out. I guess that’s why they call it a walk of faith…

Sometimes, the decision doesn’t seem clear because it doesn’t matter. Either path will bring you to where you need to be. And either way, God will be there.

* Photo courtesy of bigour.blogspot.com.

Filed Under: faith, listening to God, my walk, real life, writing March 22, 2012 By Tyler Rowan 3 Comments

Disappointed

In the past couple weeks, I’ve had the opportunity to see some people for the first time since getting back from Haiti. It seems like the question of the day is, “Did your trip change your life?!”

And I think each of them has walked away from our conversation disappointed.

You see, it’s not in me to simply tell them what they want to hear. And the honest answer to that question is, “No.” At least, not in the way I had hoped or expected.

When you hear people tell stories of missions trips, you can see how their lives have been impacted. Their hearts are captured by the people and the nation. They change how they do things at home, change where they give their money, change the way they think. I’ve seen it in our team members…

During our evening debriefs, many of our team members took a turn crying, sharing how their hearts had been broken and how they fell in love with Haiti. Others have talked about returning long-term. Some shared how hard it is for them to see food being wasted here in North America. Some are thinking of selling things, changing lifestyles, and living on less in order to give more.

I expected that to happen to me. I half expected God to call us to pack up our family and move to Haiti long, long-term. I expected my life to be changed. But it wasn’t. And for several weeks I’ve been working through the emotions of this disappointment.

Last night, after sharing with two more people that, “Yes, it was an amazing trip. We really saw God work. But no, it didn’t change my life, so to speak,” I crawled into bed and told God how disappointed I was, and how much I hated to disappoint others with my responses to their questions.

Then God reminded me of the past several years, playing them through my mind like a film reel. I saw Pat going to Haiti twice, and when he returned and shared the experience with me, my heart was captured by the people and the nation. I saw us moving to a new city, wholly dependant on God to guide our decision-making. I saw us listening to God more often, giving more generously than we had, continually seeking to grow closer to God.

And I realized why I can’t give the answer people are hoping for about whether this trip changed my life. Because my life began changing long before I took this trip on my own… The change began before Pat even left on his first missions trip.

I realized why I didn’t get the whole crying, heart-breaking, emotional experience I anticipated. Because I experienced that nearly three years previous when my husband returned from his first trip there.

I think, for many people, missions trips, conferences, and other faith-growing experience serve as a catalyst to bring them into a deeper faith. But I’m learning that, for many others, those moments of the emotional/spiritual high occur less often and less overwhelmingly.

You see, the longer we walk with God, the more He expects that we know Him and trust Him regardless of our emotions. I want the emotional rush that tells me God is working, but He says, “I want you to trust that I’m working without that ‘spiritual high.’”

The more I understand this, the less disappointed I am, because I’m remembering that God is working, He is changing my life, He is reordering my priorities – every moment of every day.

Now, if I could just figure out how to communicate that to the folks who are dying to hear about my “life-changing missions trip,” so I could avoid the let down look that crosses their faces when I answer honestly…

What about you… Are you finding that the “spiritual high” experiences are lessening the longer you walk with God? Do you miss them?

Filed Under: faith, Haiti, missions, my walk, real life March 15, 2012 By Tyler Rowan 4 Comments

Living a Life of Risk

You’ve probably heard it said that “The safest place to be is in the centre of God’s will.” I beg to differ.

In fact, I propose that the centre of God’s will is actually a very dangerous place to live.

Safe (adjective): Protected from or not exposed to danger or risk; not likely to be harmed or lost.

To be safe is to be in the seat of comfort. Physical comfort, emotional comfort, spiritual comfort. The place of comfort is a lot closer to the centre of our own will than the will of God.

Physical comfort means I hold onto things tightly – my house, my truck, my extra padding around the middle…

Emotional comfort means I keep a firm grip on my emotions, erect a wall to protect myself from the harm of being hurt by another.

Spiritual comfort means I am satisfied with a one-way relationship with God, where I talk and He listens.

When I read God’s Word, I don’t see any commands for us to be comfortable and safe. Rather, I hear God calling us to be risky. Radical. To grow and be stretched.

He tells the physically comfortable to sell everything, give to the poor, and then follow Him. (Mark 10, Luke 18)

He tells the emotionally comfortable to love without regard for oneself, concentrating on pouring out graciousness to another. (1 Corinthians 13)

He tells the spiritually comfortable to grow up, stop nursing a bottle of milk and eat meat like an adult. (Hebrews 5)

Doesn’t sound very safe at all, does it?

No, the centre of God’s will is anything but safe.

God doesn’t call us to be safe. He calls us to be sacrificial. To deny our own desires for safety and comfort, to take up our own cross – an instrument of severe torture and suffering – and follow in His footsteps.

Then He said to them all: “If anyone would come after Me, he must deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow Me…And anyone who does not carry his cross and follow me cannot be my disciple.” ~ Luke 9:23 & 14:27

Show of hands… Who’s ready to to live a life of risk, firmly planted in the centre of God’s will?!

Filed Under: faith, His Word, my walk, obedience, radical, writing February 15, 2012 By Tyler Rowan 2 Comments

What I’m Bringing Home from Haiti

I miss the Haitian coffee. It was somewhat thick, dark, and very strong, but with a rich, delicious quality to it. In comparison, my coffee these past few days has tasted like flavored water.

I miss the Haitian weather. The air was heavy with humidity, warm, with a slight breeze most days. That weather was a soothing balm to my North American skin. Now, I’m breaking out, I feel dry and itchy everywhere, and my nose is out-of-control with stuffiness!

I miss the Haitian church services. Three times a week, we worshipped. Singing, dancing, clapping, outbursts of prayers, “Amen”s, and Scripture… It was such beautiful cacaphony. Church here is quiet, reserved, conservative.

Some of the differences are striking. And the grass is always greener…

In all honesty, though I miss many things about Haiti, this is home. I could resent it, because it’s not like there. I could feel guilty about it, because it’s so much more than what anyone there has. I could sell it, and try to live more like there. But I won’t do any of those things.

Instead, I will embrace it. Home is here. In His sovereignty, God placed me here. In the land of milk and honey, material wealth, and ten months a year of cold weather – this is where He chose for me to be. So I will open my arms wide and thank Him for every piece of this place – home.

And I must say, after watching the uninhibited worship of the people in Haiti, after seeing their rock-bottom faith in a God who heals and provides in a land of illness and poverty, I think this place is in desperate need of some missionaries. Here, we are too easily entangled in the grip of our ‘things.’ We are not desperate for a God who rescues us from utter desolation. Our wealth can so easily overrun our faith.

So I will begin living as a missionary here at home. Digging deep into my faith, leaning on God for all things, giving Him credit in everything, and being a light to those around me.

We will support missionaries who go out, both short- and long-term. We will connect with our sponsor children with greater intentionality. We will continue to go out on short-term missions ourselves, eventually bringing one or two children at a time. We will grow our worldview and allow God to break our hearts for the broken-hearted around the world. We will make sacrifices so that others may experience the love of Christ.

But we will remain firmly planted where we are, here in Canada. We will ask God to open our eyes to the mission-field in front of us. And we will faithfully use the greatest gift He gave us in Haiti – the gift of prayer. There we learned to pray expecting an answer. There we learned to pray with mustard-seed, mountain-moving faith.

I’ve no doubt that what we learned there was intended for us to bring here. Because the mission-field here is a path littered with things, toys, possessions, and money… And the only way to make clear the Way is prayer.

Filed Under: faith, Haiti, missions, my walk, prayer, real life February 14, 2012 By Tyler Rowan 2 Comments

Riding the Roller-Coaster

My time in Haiti has been marked by roller-coaster emotions. There have been tears of sorrow, tears of joy, moments of laughter, and vents of frustration – all squashed together into a big melting pot covered by prayer. I hope you’ll indulge me as I share some of those experiences…

Things that brought sorrow:

Seeing people in want – no, in need – of basic necessities. Children playing in the community are clothed in filthy garments (probably their only outfits for the week, with special church clothes set aside for Sundays). Often these children have only a dirt-encrusted shirt and no pants or underwear. Those privileged enough to go to school also have a school uniform, but many are mis-sized, torn, stained, and tattered.

Children at school who do not receive their hot lunch for two days in a row, due to lack of funds.

Children sitting at their desks with no school supplies, while their peers write in notebooks with freshly sharpened pencils. Women who say they cannot come to church because they have no shoes to wear.

Men who carry cell phones and ride motorcycles, but cannot provide food for their families.

What struck me the most in these sorrowful moments was how, in some ways, our cultures are very much the same. (With the exception that North American children don’t generally go bottomless, and for about 8 months of the year, they couldn’t!)

Things that brought joy:

Yesterday, the foreman of the Haitian work crew was injured at another work site. Obviously, not a joyful thing. But every single worker on the Haiti Arise property gathered to pray for Moncello. Fifty or more people stood in a circle, held hands, and cried out to the Lord for Moncello’s healing. Many of the Haitian men could be seen wiping tears from their eyes after the prayer time.

I had the humbling honor of delivering the message in church on Sunday. I was terrified! I’ve never spoken with men in the audience, nor have I spoken with a translator. I stepped up to that podium fully under God’s strength. And the joy that surged through my soul at serving within my gifts kept me floating for hours after!

Laughter:

Our team has had such fun together. We truly enjoy each other, and there is a genuine love among us. Our evening card games can get pretty rowdy. And with a group of fairly competitive people on our team, you can imagine that most every project turns into a challenge. There was a lot of smack-talk going on between the two groups who were preparing the rice distribution bags.

Frustrations:

The most frustrating experience has been how often we are told “No.” Our hearts are to serve in the community, not just on the Haiti Arise campus. But most of our community outreach ideas (such as a soccer game ending with the handing out of soccer balls or the distribution of shoes) are gently shut-down by the leadership here.

Don’t get me wrong – I understand their reasoning. They are looking long-term, with a vision to help the people of Haiti get on their feet and for them to reject a handout mentality. They are also protecting our safety, as they don’t want us to be mobbed by a throng of desperate people. Every “No” has been justified and explained. But it’s still frustrating. And disappointing.

The sketchy internet service here was also a source of frustration for me. I live life twice – once for the experience and again in writing so that I can process the experience. And I love the community of friends that has come around me as I share. I absolutely hate that I’ve barely connected with you throughout this trip. (Apparently the internet was upgraded this morning. Total bummer that it was a week too late for me.)

Prayer:

The highlight of the trip – for me, at least – has been the way we’ve witnessed God’s answers to prayer. We pray, He answers. Over and over again. Every project we’ve embarked on, every supply we’ve unpacked and distributed, every moment of frustration or heartache has been bathed in prayer.

The spiritual lives of our team members are being (and will continue to be) transformed by our time here. People have prayed aloud for the first time. People raised their hands in worshipping the Lord for the first time. People prayed for the healing of others for the very first time.

Pat and I, as leaders, have grown so much! We’ve discovered the blessing of servant leadership by putting the needs of the team before our own needs, and we’ve grown into prayer warriors, who step into every new situation armed.

We all came to Haiti hoping to do some good here, and hoping to be changed by our experiences. I honestly cannot say how much good we’ve done. We did some construction, we equipped some teachers, we played with some children, we prayed over properties and plans, we shared our testimonies… In all these things we’ve no idea what impact they will have. But I am quite certain that all fourteen of us will return to Canada changed for the better.

Will I return to Haiti? I cannot say for sure. I’ll wait on God to provide that answer. Will I do another mission trip? Absolutely, unequivocally, YES.

And for those who are wondering about my biggest fear… Let’s just say we’re praying about it.

Filed Under: faith, Haiti, leadership, ministry, missions, my walk, obedience, prayer, real life, speaking, spritual gifts, writing February 8, 2012 By Tyler Rowan 2 Comments

Haiti, Leadership, and the Best job in the World

Whirlwind. There’s no better word.

Break Forth weekend was amazing. It’s not the same working as it is attending… I tried to stand out in the audience for part of the Jeremy Camp concert, but my place is now backstage.

I was so blessed by the hearts of our presenters – they truly were there to serve. On Saturday morning, Jared Anderson (musician) and his assistant Rick Thompson grabbed me in the hotel lobby, placed their hands on my shoulders, and prayed over our upcoming Haiti trip. (Jared had a heart connection with our trip, as he and his wife are in the process of adopting from here.)

Later on Saturday, Dr. Chris Alford (speaker on Ancient-Future Church), presented me with a beautiful ornament as a thank-you gift for my work.

And on Saturday night, when I approached my bosses (Arlen and Elsa) to let them know I was heading out, I was blessed beyond measure. They rallied everyone they could find backstage in a circle around me, laid their hands on me, and sent me off to Haiti. I bawled like a baby, kept hugging Elsa over and over, and proclaimed (through the snot) that “I have the best job in the world!”

The transition from Break Forth to Haiti went so well. I moved from one adrenaline-charged event to the next with relative ease.

I’ve been so blessed throughout this past month, in that God has given me deep, restful sleeps virtually every night. No stress or fretting, no insomnia, just rest. Praise the Lord!

However, I knew the time was coming when I would crash. I have napped daily since we arrived in Haiti! Partly due to my body needing to catch up after all the adrenaline and insanity, partly due to my body adjusting to the heat, and partly due to too many late nights.

I know I shouldn’t stay up late, but it seems to be around the midnight hour when team members come out of their shells and reach out for support, connection, and encouragement. It’s a responsibility, but also a huge blessing. My heart is so humbled that God would entrust these beautiful people to me.

It’s absolutely remarkable to me that fourteen such different people can feel like family. I love them.

We’ve ridden the wave of culture shock together (and will probably continue to do so). We’ve laughed. We’ve cried (a lot). And man have we prayed! The one thing I ask of God is that I would have the boldness to continue this prayer life back at home.

I haven’t had my “moment” yet. Several team members have shared about one event or another when Haiti captured their hearts. I haven’t had that moment. Perhaps because Haiti has held my heart for several years already. Perhaps because my speciral, profound, heart-aching moment is yet to come…

I could say so much more, but it’s time for me to head outside and take care of the guys on the construction site. I’m their unofficial gopher. I gopher water, I gopher sunscreen, I gopher whatever they need.

P.S. Yesterday was Abbey’s 10th birthday. Our entire team sang to her via cell phone. Her special post will go up, but it’s just been delayed.

P.P.S. Marc asked me to preach Sunday’s message. I sure wouldn’t mind your prayers for that!

Filed Under: Abbey, faith, Haiti, leadership, my walk, speaking February 2, 2012 By Tyler Rowan 5 Comments

Whirling

These days are awhirl with excitement and a tinge of chaos.

I have five more sleeps until Break Forth Canada begins for me (for the registrants, you’ll have to wait for seven sleeps). This means only four workdays to get stuff done. I’m quite certain that I have way more to do than I have time to do it in. Yet I know that Break Forth will go on whether I get every detail crossed off my list or not. So I’m running on a triage philosophy – dealing with the most urgent cases, anything non-life-threatening can wait, and if something is near certain death just gently letting it go.

I have nine more sleeps until we leave for Haiti. Actually, eight, as I’m not anticipating sleep on Saturday night. Our team is taking down a bunch of Rubbermaid tubs filled with supplies. We’ve been collecting supplies for months, only to receive a list of last-minute requests from on the ground in Haiti – it’s a large list! So we’re re-thinking our plans as we prepare to pack up those bins on Sunday. My heart breaks at the prospect of leaving some supplies behind, but I can’t stand the idea of bringing items not urgently needed and not providing things that are.

My truck went into the shop yesterday, and had to stay for a sleep-over. It’s never good when the check engine light comes on. I’m pretty sure that this is a distraction tactic by the enemy. The reason I’m sure – because this problem instantly caused a tight ball of stress in my belly, it has us worrying about finances, and it’s making us feel short with each other.

So in these whirling, twirling, dizzying days, I do the only thing I know will help. I cry out to God. I ask Him to give me peace in the midst of chaos, to keep my mind clear and focussed on the tasks He needs me to accomplish, and to protect me from the enemy’s tricks and tactics. I remind Him that this was His plan to begin with – both Haiti and Break Forth, and that I fully expect Him to provide for all of our needs (even the unexpected financial one). And at any given moment, when the stress of it all threatens to overcome me, I remind myself that the Creator of Heaven and Earth is the one who’s really in control here, so I don’t need to worry.

I can’t remember a time in my life when there have been so many important things going on at once. I also can’t recall a time in my life where I’ve felt such a deep, settled, inner peace. It doesn’t make sense that I should feel peaceful right now. But that’s why I know it’s from my Abba. And I’m sure, due to the prayers of our friends and family.

Thank you for thinking of us when you go before Him these next few weeks. Each prayer is treasured by our Father and by us.

Please keep up with our team while we’re on the ground – we’ll share our highs and lows, our prayer needs, and some photos of what we’re working on. CrossRoads to Haiti, 2012

“Again, I tell you that if two of you on earth agree about anything you ask for, it will be done for you by my Father in heaven. For where two or three come together in my name, there am I with them.” ~ Matthew 18:19-20

Filed Under: faith, Haiti, His Word, missions, obedience, peace, praying for, real life, working January 20, 2012 By Tyler Rowan 3 Comments

How to be Close to God

There have been times in my life where I sense God’s presence at every moment, and other times where He seems far away. The thing is, I know that God hasn’t gone anywhere. (I know this because He made me a promise, “I will never leave you nor forsake you.” Joshua 1:5b) So if He feels far away that is more a reflection of my heart and attitude than of His proximity.

There are three times in my life where God has felt close.

1. When I’m going through hell.

As much as I hate going through difficulties, there is beauty in times of struggle. During these times, I am forced to rely on God more. So He seems closer. He isn’t; in reality it’s me who’s moved closer.

During a difficult financial time in our lives, I talked to God all day, every day, about everything. I prayed as I grocery shopped, asking God about each item before I placed it in the cart. I remember being in the diary aisle, trying to decide which luxury (if any) to place in the cart – yogurt or block cheese. I was pretty sure the yogurt made more sense, because it would last longer and cost less. But I felt like God was telling me to get the cheese.

Being one of His children who has trouble with immediate obedience, I asked Him, “Why?” I felt the words, “Bless your husband,” echo through my soul. (Pat loves block cheese.) It was strange, but I obeyed. I checked out with my bill coming to something like $0.67 less than I was carrying in cash.

At this same time, we had friends who were living by faith and hand-to-mouth. They were about to leave to be missionaries, and had sold their home. The whole family was living in a dingy hotel. Another family in our church invited them to move in temporarily, until it was time for them to move away. And they had a large Rubbermaid tub full of food that they were told they did not need to bring along. God put us on their hearts, and they delivered the bin to us two days after my shopping trip.

Wouldn’t you know it, but that bin contained an 18-pack of individual yogurts!

2. When those I love are going through hell.

There’s nothing like seeing someone you dearly love suffering and struggling to bring you to your knees in prayer. Especially when you know their pain is so deep that they can’t do more than cry out the name of Jesus and collapse at the exertion.

Seeing others suffer also brings a tender, slightly guilty-feeling awareness of your own blessings. This mixture of sorrow, prayer, and thankfulness has brought me so very near to my Abba (my Daddy) many times.

3. When I seek Him with all my heart.

You will seek Me and find Me when you seek Me with all your heart. ~Jeremiah 29:13

Imagine you dropped your wedding ring in your living room. You know it’s there somewhere, but you can’t see it. How diligently, carefully, thoroughly, and time-consumingly would you search for that ring? I think that’s what “all your heart” means.

All your heart means:
- You really, truly want what you’re looking for.
- You will not – or cannot – quit until you find it.
- You are willing to sacrifice other things to continue searching.

In my life, seeking Him with all my heart looks like… Waking up and inviting God to be a part of the details of my day. When something good happens, taking a moment to thank Him. When something interrupts my timetable, taking a moment to ask Him to guide me through it and to use that interruption for my good and His glory. Obeying the quiet prompts He places in my heart – whether it’s praying for someone, paying for the coffee of the next person in line, or writing a bigger cheque than I believe I can afford.

Seeking Him with all my heart is like a teenage crush. I wake up thinking about Him. I talk to Him, write notes to Him, think about Him all day. I look forward to any stolen moment I might get with Him. My affections for Him are undivided; nothing is more important. When I hear His voice my heart rate picks up, and I’m excited.

The true honest fact of the matter is that I haven’t figured it out. The first two ways of feeling close to God are out of my control. And the third way isn’t easy. It takes time, energy, commitment, dedication, and focus. Too often, I let my time be eaten up by silly pursuits. I frequently waste my energy on over-planning and worrying. My commitment to sleep can be stronger than my commitment to time in His Word. My heart’s dedication can get all upside-down and inside-out. I can be a little “ADD,” my focus straying to whatever needs my attention for a moment, then flitting to the next thing.

Seeking Him with all my heart is not as easy as it sounds. But it is worth it. The reward is feeling so close, so loved, completely intertwined with My Lord. (And you know what, it is so much nicer to experience that closeness without the heartache that comes with the first two ways!)

How do you seek Him with all your heart?

Filed Under: faith, His Word, listening to God, my walk, obedience, real life, writing January 17, 2012 By Tyler Rowan Leave a Comment